Combos: only to be consumed within 15 miles of a hospital.

If you buy combos, and also intend on eating them, then you should be near medical assistance. These things contain more sodium than nearly any other food. They contain a strange pasty goo, and are hermetically sealed for a reason: after being opened they decay rapidly. If they are not consumed within 3 hour of being opened, they will create a toxic gas capable of searing the flesh from human bone.

Combos MUST BE CONSUMED UNDER ADULT SUPERVISION, and should be washed down with straight Pepto Bismol. Water will not do the trick. If you don't have Pepto Bismol handy, pure olive oil is a good beverage to pair with your combos. DO NOT BUY COMBOS THAT WERE PACKAGED OVER THREE MONTHS AGO. And definitely do not feed COMBOS to children under 8 years old.

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*Please note: This page is complete nonsense, and is not intended in any way to be a nutritional guide*

*It is not intended to be anything, really. It is a big fat bunch of lies; organized incoherently.*

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