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Whether candied or not, a cigarette is a delicious treat!
Young or old, it makes no difference. Smoking tobacco is a soothing and wonderful thing to partake in. Ideally, there would be no age restriction on the purchase of carcinogens. But we must make due. 18 years is a long time to wait before legally filling the lungs with toxic gas, and this candy is just what we need to make our progeny feel comfortable with the idea. Getting our kids comfortable with the concept of holding a cigarette - the shape, size; the romance! It's really a good idea. It's like a game!
Screw that.
Are you kidding me? How about we just go ahead and make candied booze bottles? A miniature six-pack of plastic bottles that say "Budwizer," filled with several delicious flavors of soda...that would be great! How about selling mini-kegs full of apple juice! Brilliant! Could we take things a step further by selling shots of hawaiian punch in restaurants to kids under 21 years of age? That way, EVERYBODY CAN PARTY! The last idea I could think of is a candy water-BONG. Here's how it could work: First, You fill the bong with Grape juice and pack the bowl with BIG LEAGUE CHEW. NEXT, you take a nice big "hit" off the pipe. Out comes some chewing gum, and a splash of juice! Harmless fun!
